In order to obtain the focus I need to get through these next, extremely challenging, 3.5-4 years, many elements must come into play.

It is so important right now that I take time out to focus on me. I have spent way too much time letting myself drift into everyone else's lives including spending unnecessary amounts of time talking to my dogs. :-)

As much as I like to consider myself to not be a very materialistic person, for once I truly see something material as being very beneficial to my mental health. I wish I could go through with purchasing a Macbook right here and NOW simply to save my sanity. This PC is running slower than I think it ever has before and preventing me from accomplishing simple tasks or research for classes in a decent amount of time. I spend far too much time restarting it or screaming profanities at it.

On the bright side of things, I've come to accept the reality of living with my parents throughout college. I am beginning to see all of the benefits and the money I will be able to save up and use on much more exciting things. Things have really lightened up around here and I feel now more than ever they have gained an even greater sum of respect for me than they have in the past.

I also am beginning to see the beauties of not having my name tied to anyone else's around this point in my life. There are a million other far more important things I need to be focusing on and the opposite sex actually tends to make my grades plummet. No offense, males.

I have never looked forward to seeing the Earth in bloom than this year. After walking outside with a -13 degree wind chill this morning I could only think that: "It can't get much worse than this." I mean that in an extremely optimistic, way, too. I have ridden my bike through some of the most extreme conditions this winter, even fallen off of it in the ice due to my stubbornness. I am proud of myself for sucking it up and not always giving in to riding those damn PARTA buses.

What I'm trying to say is that, I'm happy, I guess. I am slightly nervous, but that is to be expected. So far my first exam grade is satisfactory, but it's a better start than I had imagined it would be. I need some prayer in that area.